From Our Principal
Over the years I have often written about the various roles parents undertake to prepare their children for the vigours of secondary school life and beyond. One of the roles is that we need to increasingly make ourselves become a little less redundant each year, because believe me, one of the rewards of perseverance, consistent & fair consequences, wisely choosing when and where to intervene, especially in the teenage years, is…they leave. This may sound a little harsh but it’s not like you want them to leave (well …there are moments!) but the satisfaction gained from witnessing in a very short period of time a person who relied upon their parents for every single thing from basic survival needs to formal attire, evolve into a confident, independent and happy young adult, is certainly worth the effort and the odd heart wrenching decision.
One of the difficulties faced by young children, especially with kids from about Grade 3-5, is the ability to know the difference between telling tales and reporting incidents which teachers need to know about. Generally, kids in Prep to Year 2 will tell you everything. However, depending on the maturity level of students as they get older they begin to understand the difference. For some kids, peer influence is a major contributor in regards to their willingness to “dob” on their mates or not. Consequently, while kids are trying to work all this out, there will be times when reportable incidents go “un-reported”.
A good rule of thumb to use is that if you feel physically or emotionally hurt by actions or words of others then it is a reportable incident. Alternatively, if you were able to handle it at the time with learnt protective behaviour strategies then involving others may only lead to escalating or fanning the flames of the issue.
It is important to acknowledge children’s feelings but as adults we need to be aware of not becoming too involved in an issue that should belong to them. The key is to place things in context. Is it an overreaction of something minor due to tiredness, stress etc.? Is it attention seeking behaviour or is it a real concern? Definitely not an easy task for parents to do but assisting kids to resolve their own disputes is a wonderful life lesson and a stressbuster for parents. This is a BIG FAMILY strategy. If you had more than 4 kids, you would be too busy to respond to children’s tales of the less than serious variety. Here are some responses to try when a child comes to you with a tale or story about the dastardly, terrible things that may have occurred at school or between siblings:
The Disaster Scale
“Where does this fit on the disaster scale from 1 to 10?”
Kids can easily blow issues out of proportion so that a child taking a siblings’ sock is suddenly two rungs above a violent hurricane and losing socks is suddenly the worst thing that can happen. The Disaster Scale helps kids gain a little perspective.
Invite them to solve the issue themselves
“Can you handle this yourself? Is this something you can deal with?
You’ll never know if you don’t give them a go! Put the issue back on the kids to resolve. It’s not that you don’t want to help but really some things don’t need your help!
The shock tactic
“What would you like me to do about this?”
This is my favourite response as it puts the onus back on to the child. Be prepared for surprises though as some kids just want you to send their siblings away to boarding school!
Problem-ownership
“Does this problem really involve you?”
Some children just love to get involved in disputes that don’t involve them but they love to get a certain ‘sibling into trouble’. Don’t be drawn into such disputes or else you will soon be doing the ‘sibling dance’ with them, with the ‘tell taler’ taking the lead.
Put them in the same boat
“I’ll listen to both of you when you can tell me the same story.”
This is the first step in the conflict resolution cycle. If two children have a tale of woe get them to agree on the story they tell. This is usually enough to resolve the dispute.
The pen and paper approach
“Can you write down what happened?"
Give one child a pen and the other a piece of paper and invite them to write down exactly what happened. A considered written response will be taken very seriously by parents.
Of course, no single strategy will work overnight and like us every child, teenager and young adults even the confident ones, will have their ups and downs. It’s the strategies and support they receive along the way that will ultimately see them through the so called tough times. Parenting is extremely hard work and at times the hardest decisions, even though they might not be the most popular decisions are the best for children in the long term. Becoming increasingly redundant as parents is not an easy path but it is one of life’s necessities for parents and their children.
Social Distancing
Parents, I really do need you to work with us in regards to maintaining social distancing whilst on school grounds, particularly at pick up time. It is most important that you leave the school grounds as quickly as possible once the children have been dismissed from class. Traditionally this a great time for social gatherings but whilst the restrictions are in place, please avoid congregating in groups even for a quick chat and catch up. Thank you for your co-operation.
Winter Uniform
It has come to my attention that a number of students are arriving at school without a tie. The school tie is part of the winter uniform and is required on the days they wear their formal uniform. We receive many positive comments each year about how good our uniform looks. This is due not only to the style of uniform but in the way students and their families take pride in their school uniform and abide by the uniform code.
Being Lourdes Learners
During Term 1, we commenced focussing on the attributes of a successful learner or “Being a Lourdes Learner.” This of course was punctuated by the period of remote learning. Now that we are all back on deck, the teachers and support staff have begun revisiting these attributes. For any strategy to fulfil its potential, the common message needs to be heard at home as well as at school. Please take the time to read Ms. Murray’s Teaching and Learning section of the newsletter to gain some insight into what is the common language the kids will be hearing at school about what it takes to be a successful learner.
School Fees
A reminder that school fee invoices were emailed to all families last week. Your prompt attention to the payment of these fees will be of great assistance in ensuring that resources and services are maintained. If any family has been genuinely affected financially by the COVID-19 restrictions on various jobs, please do not hesitate to contact me in order to arrange alternative payment options. A reminder that school fees are no longer sent home monthly. They are calculated quarterly and forwarded home via email once a term. The amount of fees that appears on your invoice is the quarterly amount not the monthly amount.
Playground Upgrade
The joint School and P&F project to upgrade of the play area in Goodwood street is almost complete. The new fence that was erected over the weekend looks great and will provide greater security to school property and will help a great deal in containing footballs etc. within the grassed area. The play fort was removed a few weeks ago to provide more space to conduct sports training and lunch time play activities. Some of this equipment will be relocated to other parts of the playground. Still to come is the installation of an automatic irrigation system and new turf where the play fort used to be and aerating and top dressing of the existing grassed area. Shot put and discus circles will also be installed.
Capital Grant
Over the past 5 or 6 years, plans have been in place to construct new classrooms and a new administration building. With a gradual increase in enrolments it is important that our facilities continue to meet the teaching and learning needs of the students and staff. Last year the school narrowly missed out on receiving a capital grant for the construction of these new facilities. Keeping in line with our theme of “persistence & perseverance” we recently submitted another application for federal funding. Next Monday, I will be presenting our application to an eight-member panel who are responsible for making the decision on which applications are successful and which are not. With limited funds and considering there are 33 schools and 3 proposed new schools across Queensland in this year’s round, the decision making process is a very difficult one. Wish me luck and a few prayers won’t go astray either!